MKRecoveryCoaching.com

Author: Melissa Killeen

  • What Do I Need to Know to Be a Recovery Coach?

    (The following is the second in an ongoing series of excerpts taken from Melissa Killeen’s new book, RECOVERY COACHING — A Guide to Coaching People in Recovery from Addictions. This text is from Chapter 6, What Do I Need to Know to Be a Recovery Coach?)

    To Be a Recovery Coach

    It is not a requirement for a recovery coach to be in recovery from any addiction. However, it is good for the recovery coach to draw the five concepts of recovery to begin to work with their client. These key concepts of recovery are what every recovery coach needs to instill in their client:

    1. To have hope
    2. To embrace personal responsibility
    3. To educate themselves about recovery and addiction
    4. Embrace self advocacy
    5. To give support and service

    If a recovery coach is not knowledgeable in the addiction the client identifies with, it is advisable to refer the client to a recovery coach or mutual aid program that is knowledgeable in that particular issue. Speaking to another coach is a good move when you are faced with a client that may have an addiction you are not familiar with. However, if a coach has a question about a client’s addiction, or is making a client based decision, it is important to seek the advice of a coaching supervisor as the first step in attempting to come to a conclusion.

    Process Addictions

    Many times, the addictions that a recovery coach maybe unfamiliar with are non-substance related. These addictions are often called ‘process addictions’. Process addictions can be:

    1. Gambling
    2. Sex or Pornography
    3. Love or Romance
    4. Shopping or Over Spending
    5. Eating Disorders
    6. Self Harm, Mutilation or Cutting
    7. Internet or Gaming Addictions

    The term process addiction can be misleading, these addictions are sometimes called behavioral addictions, whereas the person is addicted to a compulsive behavior that involves a process, not a substance. This term is often used as a blanket definition for any compulsive behavior which does not involve an addictive substance. However, some mental health disorders also involve compulsive behaviors, such as Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and Impulse Control Disorders. Some process addictions involve a substance, as in overeating, and the addictive substance may be flour and/or sugar. Addictive process behaviors produce neurochemicals (e.g., serotonin, dopamine or the neuropeptide; oxytocin) in the brain that create a reaction in the person’s body. The neurochemical reactions create a euphoric feeling as well as the physical actions (the shopping or cutting) create a distraction for the client. It is the reaction to the neurochemicals and the distraction that provides the client the feeling the client is addicted to. An example of using a process or behavioral addiction is when someone engages in retail therapy; which is going shopping in order to make themselves feel less depressed.

    RECOVERY COACHING — A Guide to Coaching People in Recovery from Addictions gives readers something that “hasn’t been done before: a thorough explanation of recovery coaching” states Omar Manejwala, M.D. author and former Medical Director of the Hazelden Treatment Centers, “this [book] will be an indispensable resource for both the coach just starting out or the veteran.”

    If you are interested in purchasing Melissa Killeen’s new book, click below.

    Recovery Coaching
    A Guide to Coaching People in Recovery from Addictions

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  • What is the difference between a recovery coach, a sponsor or a therapist?

    (The following is the first in a series of excerpts taken from Melissa Killeen’s new book, RECOVERY COACHING — A Guide to Coaching People in Recovery from Addictions. This text is from Chapter 5, How Does a Recovery Coach Guide a Client Through Recovery?)

    A recovery coach is not a sponsor, therapist, physician or priest. Even though there is a strong spiritual component in the recovery coach’s repertoire, the recovery coach is not a clergy member promoting a specific religion or church. As a coach, I follow both the International Coaching Federation’s Code of Ethics and the Core Competencies drafted by Recovery Coaches International (a professional association of recovery coaches) emphasizing the differences in a therapist, doctor, a 12-step program sponsor and a recovery coach:

    1. Therapy is for those clients seeking relief from emotional or psychological pain. Therapy focuses on the past and how past unresolved issues are impacting the present. Coaching focuses on the present and what can be done, today, to move the client forward. Ethical guidelines require coaches to refer clients to a therapist or doctor if emotional or physical pain is evident. Recovery Coaching is often used in conjunction with therapy but not as a replacement for it.

    2. Coaching separates itself from other professional healthcare relationships and roles such as a physician or a nurse, because a coaching-client relationship is a partnership. Whereas in a professional relationship, the physician or nurse has expert knowledge and they impart this knowledge as a form of advice, diagnosis or offering solutions. Coaches do not diagnose or impart solutions. Coaches encourage their clients to come up with self-powered solutions.

    3. Sponsors from a 12-step program are different from coaches, as they are not paid professionals and they encourage abstinence from addictions by advocating use of a 12-step program. A recovery coach is not limited to using the twelve steps and traditions as a pathway to recovery. A recovery coach can suggest using SMART Recovery, Kundalini yoga, or the Buddhist path to freedom from alcoholism and addiction in order to help their client in recovery. Recovery coaching is not affiliated with any 12-step program or mutual aid group and does not promote a particular path of recovery; a recovery coach encourages the client to select their path and works with their client along that particular selection. (Susskind, 2006, Recovery Coaches International.org, 2006, Loveland & Boyle 2005).

    A recovery coach has to establish certain ethical standards in order to help a recovering client. Simple emotional characteristics such as compassion and empathy go a long way, but do not help the coach in a crisis with their client. Educated with the knowledge of ethical standards, the core competencies and their experience, a knowledgeable and strong recovery coach can emerge. The ICF Code of Ethics and Core Competencies are recommended as a reference for recovery coaches. Visit Wikipedia to learn more about recovery coaching by clicking here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Recovery_coaching.

    RECOVERY COACHING — A Guide to Coaching People in Recovery from Addictions gives readers something that “hasn’t been done before: a thorough explanation of recovery coaching” states Omar Manejwala, M.D. author and former Medical Director of the Hazelden Treatment Centers, “this [book] will be an indispensable resource for both the coach just starting out or the veteran.”

    If you are interested in purchasing Melissa Killeen’s new book, click below.

    Recovery Coaching
    A Guide to Coaching People in Recovery from Addictions

    buyitnow1

    Share

  • 7 Questions Wives of Porn Addicts Often Ask (part 3)

    (This  is part 3 of a reprint of a 2011 post that’s as timely now as it was then)

    This week guest blogger is Ella Hutchinson, MA, LPC, Ella is a Licensed Professional Christian Counselor certified in treating sex addiction and specializes in counseling partners of sexual addicts. She practices at Comfort Christian Counseling in Katy Texas.

    #7: Is there hope? Can a man like this change?

    Recovery from sexual addiction is very much possible. Men who get out feel a sense of freedom, as if a huge boulder has been lifted off their chest. It is such a liberating feeling that many men forget that their wives are still grieving from his actions and likely will be for some time.

    For some men, simply the threat of their wife leaving is enough to cause them to get help. But for many others, they need something more. This can cause you, as the wife, to feel helpless. You are not helpless. You can’t control your husband’s recovery, but as the injured spouse, you can control your own. The fact that you need recovery does not mean you are sick or that something is wrong with you, but that you have likely been traumatized by your husband’s behavior. Your recovery includes building up a support system for yourself. Don’t keep silent. Reach out to a trusted friend, your pastor, or a therapist. Keeping this secret will cause feelings of shame, loneliness and isolation. Finding a support group for wives of sex/porn addicts can be very helpful. If there is not one in your area, there are phone support groups available, led by trained life coaches and therapists who have been in your shoes. Finally, learn to recognize your unmet needs and what it will take to meet them. A skilled therapist can help you with this. The absolute best book written for wives is Your Sexually Addicted Spouse by Barbara Steffens and Marsha Means. I strongly encourage you to find a therapist (individual and marriage) who is familiar with this book and subscribes to the treatment model described in it. If your therapist isn’t familiar, ask if they’d be willing to read it.

    (more…)

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